I was having babies at home around the same time. The chief complaint was, I have become a monster and nobody should be living with me basically. And they were sort of frozen and terrified of themselves and they kept exploding in anger and rage, in an uncontrolled way. What did you see when you began this work?īessel van der Kolk: What we saw was a bunch of guys who a very short time ago must have been very competent and skillful, people who and something had been knocked out of them. Kate: Your work began when you studied Vietnam vets at the VA in the 1970s. So I’m just especially grateful for you.īessel van der Kolk: Terrific, I’m glad to be here.
When I was first diagnosed, your book was actually the first gift I received that was not trying to sell me a magical cure for pain. He has taught at universities and hospitals around the world and is the author of the best selling book, and it is absolutely stunning, The Body Keeps the Score: brain, mind and body in the healing of trauma. His efforts resulted in the founding of the Trauma Center in Massachusetts that does research and offers nationwide training to a variety of people in caregiving, educational and mental health professions. Bessel van der Kolk has spent his career studying how children and adults adapt to traumatic experiences and has worked tirelessly to develop effective treatments. If you want to learn more about the world of memory and the hope of change. Trauma, as our very esteemed guest today explains, compromises the brain area that communicates the actual physical and embodied feeling of being alive. We are a memory book, but what happens if we get stuck there? Today, we’re talking about trauma and the way it keeps us stuck, the way it continues to organize our experiences and our thoughts and our reactions as if our past is still happening, some unchangeable and immutable past, something that seems to reach out into the future, whether we want it to or not. Nostalgia, the stories we tell, the high school reunions that happen all the time on Facebook. Kate: We are all living in the past, at least every now and then. Life is a chronic condition and there’s no cure for being human. We can have beauty and meaning, community and love, and we will need each other if we’re going to tell the truth. And it’s OK that life isn’t always getting better. There are some things we can change and some things we can’t. I’ve written multiple books on the history of the idea that you can always fix your life. The world loves you better when you are shiny, when you are cheerful, when you still believe that your best life now is right around the corner. And here’s the very fun thing about that. When I was 35, I was diagnosed with stage four cancer. If only you tried to eat this food, find that relationship, just get the kids graduated or the parents this kind of care.
It’s hard to give up on the feeling that the life you want is just out of reach.
But lately, in a world that promises endless progress, even now in a pandemic, I realized I just need to be a person. I’m a historian, author, aggressively, fast walker. Kate Bowler: I’m Kate Bowler, and this is Everything Happens.
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